tearful

oh gosh!!
it has been already one week i got here - Aussie
if you ask me how do i feel or how i find here
to be honest, i really have no idea what to reply you
and actually i really feel regret to come here for two years
i feel so sorry to my family especially my daddy
he did asked me to go for only one year as the fees is really expensive
my daddy feels difficult to afford my school fees, living cost as well as the hostel rental
if i do listen to him, he can be more relax and i can enjoy one more year in msia
go and forth between monash sunway campus and my home
i really hate myself that i did not know how to feel precious and appreciate everything i got when im at home and even in msia
after i got here, i must do everything by myself
washing clothes, washing dishes, preparing meals, taking care of every valuables and so on
i can really now feel the burden and the responsibility for everything
after i got here, i really miss home and family so much
finally i realized that how hard my daddy has to work to ensure that we can enjoy our life without any anxiety
finally i realized that how hard my mommy has to take good care of us and to share my father's burden
finally i realized that how hard Mui Jie has to work to avoid us from worrying about doing house chores
and the most important...
finally i realized that money is the scariest thing in the world!!!
i really feel very regret that i was so insist on coming for two years
mommy, papa! really sorry!! please forgive me!!
oh no my tears are dropping